A Baby At Last : Common Sense Wisdom for Getting Pregnant after 40!

A Baby At Last for singer Celine Dion , age 42 - after a reported six IVF failures at a New York fertility center. But experts say regardless of your age, the secret to fertility success is to stay focused, recognize your feelings, and make sure you communicate those feelings to your partner and your doctor! Here's how to do it all!

By Colette Bouchez

" A BABY AT LAST! " These are the words that warm our hearts - particularly when they come from a woman over 40! Why? Because everyone knows that having a baby is one of life's greatest joys - and when you've gone through a long struggle just to get pregnant - and finally do so after age 40 - the joy of being able to say " A baby at last" is something you will never forget!

At the same time, the weeks, months and sometimes years leading up to that moment can strain a couple to the brink - not only financially, but emotionally. And for some it is a time when they turn away from each other, instead of towards each other. Why does it happen?

According to relationship experts Poula and Hans Jorn Filges, one reason is that couples undergoing fertility treatments simply don't talk enough to each other or relay how they really feel.

"It's important that couples talk to each other, not at each other - that they share their frustrations instead of taking their frustrations out on each other. This is true of any situation, but it is especially true when something as fragile as your fertility is involved," says Poula Filges, who, with her husband Hans Jorn Filges co-authored the Danish best selling book " Let's Talk."

Being able to speak the words " A Baby at Last" is wonderful, says Poula Filges, but, she says, "it's also important to speak a lot of other words so that you can finally get to that point - it's all about communication, and it makes a huge difference in how you will get through this experience," she says.

According to New York fertility expert Dr. Niels Lauersen, talking is an extremely important part of not only partner communication, but also doctor-patient relations - and it can even influence the success of your treatments.

"Too many times couples feel intimidated to share their emotional feelings about their infertility, not only with each other, but even with their fertility doctor ; they try to put up a brave front and pretend they are coping fine, when in fact, they are not ," says Lauersen, author of the international best selling infertility book " Getting Pregnant: What You Need To Know Now" ( Simon & Schuster/Fireside Books, NY).

What they almost never realize, he says, is that the stress and the anxiety that builds up when you don't share how you are feeling , can actually have an impact on the success of whatever fertility treatments you are trying.

"If you are stressed , if your relationship with your partner is under stress, your body thinks 'Hmm this is not a good time for her to get pregnant' - and it can actually work to keep you from conceiving," says Lauersen. If all you think about are when you are going to be able to speak the words " A baby at last" , the stress can really get out of hand, he says.

At the same time, sharing your feelings and your fears with your doctor can not only help you to better cope, it can help him or her to tailor your treatments to be even more successful.

"When a couple opens up and tells their doctor how they are feeling, the doctor can sometimes make important adjustments in medication or even prescribe nutritional or other natural ways to help them combat the stress so that their fertility treatments can actually work better," says Lauersen, the medical director of GettingPregnantNow.org .

Poula Filges agrees: " A couple must talk to each other, but they must also share how they are feeling with their doctor - and doctors must also become more adept at listening and helping their patients to talk to them, to make themselves more accessible and let the patient know they are interested in what they think and feel emotionally."

A Baby At Last: It Can Happen For You!

Today, getting pregnant is easier and more likely to happen than ever before. The technologies that have come forward in just the last decade alone are astounding in the number of problems they can solve.

Still, experts say that for some the most difficult part of getting pregnant is grappling with the frustration, the anxiety and the fear of never being able to say the words "A Baby At Last" . And if that's how you feel, experts say talking can do wonders !

"If you find you cannot talk to your doctor, talk to a trusted friend, your mother, your sister - and especially talk to your partner and encourage him to talk to you as well. When you do everything in life - including getting pregnant - becomes a lot easier," says Lauersen.

For the latest health, beauty and style advice for women over 40 subscribe to RedDressDiary - It's Free! And be sure to check out CheapChicDiary.com for money saving beauty and style tips!

Copyright by ElleMedia Network 2010 - All Rights Reserved.In addition to US Copyright, the text of this RedDressDiary article is licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution-ShareAlike 3.0 License. All formatting and style elements of this page are not available under this license, and Colette Bouchez retains all rights in those elements.

Don't "B" Blue: New Study Shows Vitamins Help Depression

A new study shows two vitamins can help keep boomers out of the dumps! Here’s what you need to know...

By Colette Bouchez

Feeling a little down in the dumps? Not so happy about that big 50 (or 60, or 70 ) birthday looming on the horizon?

Before you reach for an anti-depressant pill, try increasing your intake of vitamins B6 and B12 – two nutrients that studies now show can help prevent depression from taking hold in your life.

The new study of some 3,500 Chicago residents just published in the American Journal of Clinical Nutrition reports that for every 10 mg increase in B6 and every 10 mcg increase in B12 the risk of developing symptoms of depression decreases by 2 percent a year.

Now while that might not seem like a lot, over time those percentages can add up quicker than those extra pounds on your hips - and that can help keep you might entering your senior years feeling a lot worse than you should.

This study supports previous evidence showing that in general B Vitamins help reduce the risk of depression.

To set the stage for the study researchers obtained dietary and vitamin intake information from some 3,500 men and women from the Chicago area, all 65 years of age or older. Using a clinical depression scale questionnaire they also obtained data on the participants state of mind, including depression symptoms.

The researchers then followed this group of people for over 7 years to see how their dietary and supplement habits may have affected their state of mind.

What they found: Those participants who had increased intakes of vitamins B6 and B12 were much less likely to experience depression. Although the B vitamins came from both food and supplements researchers say it was the supplements alone that appeared to have the most impact on reducing risks.

“Our results support the hypotheses that high total intakes of vitamins B6 and B12 are protective of depressive symptoms over time in community-residing older adults,” concluded the researchers.

How B Vitamins Protect Against Depression

While the study did not uncover any specific reasons why the vitamins supplements were helpful, other research has shown a link between B vitamins and depressive symptoms. In several studies researchers reported that B 12 appears to be necessary to process certain brain chemicals that directly impact neurotransmitters – the chemical impulses that allow brain cells to communicate and play a role in mood disorders.

Vitamin B12 is also believed to prevent the build up of certain amino acids, particularly homocystine, which is linked to an increased risk of depression. Increased levels of homocysteine have also been linked to an an increased risk of heart disease , stroke and diabetes, and most recently infertility in women with Poly Cystic Ovary Syndrome.

Interestingly, as we age, our digestive tract is less efficient at pulling B12 from the foods we eat – one reason that older adults are frequently deficient in this nutrient. So that’s another important reason to supplement with this vitamin.

Also important to note: Another member of the B vitamin family – a nutrient known as “inositol” - has been found effective against both depression and panic attacks. It is also believed to work by increasing brain cell communication and enhancing neurotransmitter activity.

What To Do Right Now

Regardless of your age, taking a good multi vitamin is a great way to begin ensuring that you meet all your vitamin and mineral requirements. Adding an extra B vitamin supplement may also be helpful. But don't let that dissuade from also eating a healthy diet - and stocking up on some B-healthy foods.

To get your daily supply of B6, a fortified whole grain breakfast cereal is your best bet. But you can also try white meat chicken, bananas, potatoes, and garbanzo beans which are also high in this nutrient.

If you’re deficient in vitamin B12, one serving of liver gives you a whopping 800 times the daily requirement, while a serving of clams offers nearly 600 times the daily dose. Other foods high in B12 include Rainbow trout, sockeye salmon, beef sirloin or a cheeseburger.

But remember, some of these foods are also high in calories and fat, so don’t overload your plate!

For the latest health, beauty and style advice for women over 40 subscribe to RedDressDiary - It's Free! And be sure to check out CheapChicDiary.com for money saving beauty and style tips!


Copyright by ElleMedia Network 2010 - All Rights Reserved.In addition to US Copyright, the text of this RedDressDiary article is licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution-ShareAlike 3.0 License. All formatting and style elements of this page are not available under this license, and Colette Bouchez retains all rights in those elements.

A Kinder, Gentler AntiBacterial - Plus A New Warning You Can't Miss!

It was recently announced that the FDA and the EPA will be taking a closer look at health dangers linked to chemicals commonly found in hand sanitizers, anti bacterial soaps and more! RedDressDiary offers up the latest findings – plus gives you a look at some powerful all natural anti-bacterials that protect without health concerns.

By Colette Bouchez

To be perfectly honest I was never a big fan of anti-bacterial products. I mean really, who needs all those chemicals when good old fashioned hot water and soap seemed just fine.

But that philosophy recently changed when a family member contracted a highly contagious bacterial eye infection – and the doctor advised taking additional steps to protect against transmission, including using hand sanitizers and antibacterial soaps.

Of course my first choice was to just go to a hotel - I mean who needs anti bacterial soap when you can have room service, right? :)

But budgetary concerns (and the need for a new washing machine) taking precedent, I went directly to Plan B – which was to locate the least offensive antibacterial line of products I could find. And what an eye-opening experience that turned out to be. Why?

First, I discovered that nearly every anti-bacterial product on the market contained just one basic chemical ingredient: triclosan. Secondly – I was astounded by the number of health concerns linked to this one ingredient!

What kind of concerns? According to the Environmental Working Group’s database of hazardous chemicals, studies on triclosan found links to cancer, allergies, immuno- toxicities, irritation of the skin, eyes and lungs, as well as having a host of developmental and reproductive toxicity issues. Also know as a “hormone disruptor” there is some concern that triclosan may, in fact, be especially bad for anyone dealing with breast or endometrial cancer - both of which have hormonal components - or to any couple trying to conceive.

In fact, researching just a little deeper I also discovered that triclosan is actually a pesticide closely related to dioxin – a known chemical health threat, endocrine disruptor, and carcinogen. According to the FDA, triclosan “could be” and is “suspected to be “ contaminated with dioxins!

What’s more, I also discovered the European Union classifies triclosan as dangerous to the environment while both the Canadian and Japanese governments have banned its use in cosmetics.

WAIT A MINUTE ….it’s in cosmetics? I thought we were talking soaps and hand sanitizers?

Indeed, yet one more eye-opener: Not only does triclosan dominate the antibacterial product market, it’s also in a ton-o-products that don’t even whisper it’s name on the label.

You can, in fact, find triclosan in not only many cosmetics, but also in soaps, dishwashing detergents, toothpastes, shampoos, skin creams and moisturizers, shaving gels, kids toys, workout clothes, and socks, to name a few! ( See full product list here). And because of this, it’s also found its way into our environment.

According to Rep. Edward J. Markey (D-Mass.), who has been pushing federal regulators to take stronger action to restrict the use of triclosan and other chemicals, “ It’s in our drinking water, it's in our rivers and as a result, it's in our bodies. . . . I don't think a lot of additional data has to be collected in order to make the simple decisions about children's toys and soaps that people use. It clearly is something that creates a danger,” he recently told The Washington Post.

Indeed, the exposure to triclosan is now so great that the US Centers for Disease Control and Prevention report that residues are showing up in the urine of 75% of Americans.

That said, Brian Sansoni of the Soap and Detergent Association,which represents the 30 billion US cleaning products industry recently said in an interview that concerns about triclosan are unfounded.

In a quote to the Washington Post he added " These products and ingredients have been reviewed, regulated and researched for decades," and he added that " science strongly supports the safety and efficacy of these products." He also said that the time was not only right for these products, but that they were necessary to protect us in a time of increased threats from disease.

Kinder, Gentler, Anti Bacterial Protection: It's Here Now!

Currently, both the FDA and The Environmental Protection Agency have agreed to take a second, much harder look at triclosan, including whether or not it could be causing us harm. But as anyone who has ever waited for a government report can tell you, answers are not likely to affect what’s on supermarket shelves any time soon.

So what’s a girl to do in the meantime ? First, remember that studies also show that vigorous hand washing for 20 seconds or more with regular old soap and hot water will go a long way in wiping out most germs destined to do us in.

But if you’re looking for an extra edge of protection, I’m happy to report there are kinder, safer natural antibacterial products available! In fact, one of the single most powerful anti bacterial ingredients available today is an all natural oil known as thyme that alone, or most often in combination with a series of other essential oils can provide the same (or better) protection as triclosan, without the inherent dangers.

Moreover, these same oils have been shown in independent laboratory studies to kill the “ bad” bacteria ( including MRSA, salmonella and E-coli) without destroying the “good” bacteria on skin that is designed to keep us healthy.

According to Dr. Larry Weiss, the medical director of CleanWell, one such company to use a combination of thyme and other natural oils, (and no triclosan) in all their antibacterial products, “ The good bacteria on our hands and skin helps us stay healthy by protecting against bad germs we’re exposed to through contact; that’s why it’s important to choose soaps and hand sanitizers that help your body maintain a healthy balance of bacteria.”

But are these natural, “balanced” products as good as the chemical guns in killing off those bad germs? The answer is yes.

• In the case of Cleanwell, the natural oils have been tested in independent laboratories using methods approved by the EPA and FDA.

• In the all- natural anti-bacterial soap “DEFENSE”, a combination of tea tree oil and oil of Eucalyptus, claims clinical effectiveness against bacteria associated with MRSA, ringworm, staph, impetigo, herpes, jock itch and athletes foot, and provides data on the ability to kill E-coli bacteria on contact.

• California Baby also offers up a natural antibacterial wash for both children and adults. It relies on lemon, tea tree oil and ravensara for natural antibacterial properties along with a recommendation to “vigorously “ wash your hands for 20 seconds or more for the best protection.

And that's just the beginning of what you will find - if you take the time to look! The best place to start are stores featuring natural or organic products. Most companies also make their products available online so a little Googling can help as well!

Ultimately, I chose the Cleanwell line of products.First because I was able to purchase them at a local drug store for under $5.00. But also because I believe they had the most impressive clinical testing record and evidence of effectiveness - and because they were also food safe. Which meant I could use them on my kitchen counters and even to wash dishes during critical times, as well as safely use the sprays and hand sanitizers when dining out and around kids and pets. I also found the scents to be the most pleasant, particularly the Spearmint Lime and the Ginger Begamot. And while I can't say for sure if the Cleanwell products helped cut down transmission during our eye infection trauma, I can say that no one else in my family caught it - so that was a relief!

In the end we may not be able to do much to avoid triclosan and other chemicals we don’t know are in the products we use. But at least we can feel pretty good about being able to intelligently choose the products we do use - and give ourselves and our families some protection from harm.

To learn more about the hidden sources and products containing Triclosan , click here . To find out more about all natural anti bacterial products click here.

To learn more about health, beauty and style for women over 40 visit RedDressDiary.com - your source for fabulous over 40! Or visit CheapChicDiary.com for money saving tips and advice on beauty and fashion for women of all ages!

Copyright by ElleMedia Network 2010 - All Rights Reserved.In addition to US Copyright, the text of this RedDressDiary article is licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution-ShareAlike 3.0 License. All formatting and style elements of this page are not available under this license, and Colette Bouchez retains all rights in those elements. Any products mentioned in RedDressDiary or CheapChicDiary may or may not have provided samples for review and testing. Clicking on any link in this blog may benefit the author.